There is no convenient roadmap for reconciliation. There is no short cut or simple prescription for healing the wounds of people in the aftermath of sustained conflict. Creating a trust and understanding between two or more communities that were divided is an extremely difficult challenge. Yet, reconciliation is an essential part of building a lasting peace. Examining the painful memories of the past, acknowledging them, understanding and above all, transcending it together is the best way to guarantee that the conflicts cannot happen again. Reconciliation has only recently been recognized as a necessary component of post-conflict reconstruction. Anyhow, it cannot be a quick fix but requires time and patience, an incremental approach and a capacity to evolve and adapt to challenges and opportunities. In this process of searching for truth, justice forgiveness and healing, the ultimate goal should be lasting peace. Reconciliation does not necessarily mean to love the human once thought of as enemies, or to forgive them and forget the past somehow, but it is more of finding a way to co-exist with them, to develop the necessary cooperation to share the society with them so that people may have a better life together than what they have had separately. While dealing with the issues that divided a nation in the past, it is important to redesign the relationships between communities. If efforts can be taken to address these two parallel processes, there will be a great reward which is eternal peace enabling society to move from a divided past to a shared future.
Overcoming suspicion and distrust
Sri Lanka after experiencing decades of conflict is now progressing in the process of rebuilding and reconciliation. Different parties have been involved with post conflict reconciliation and peace building in Sri Lanka. Despite progressive efforts in rehabilitation, rebuilding, development and establishing social justice, healing the wounds and reconciliation still needs to be addressed and further strengthened.
Many people especially the victims of hurt are suspicious of reconciliation and see it as brushing aside or ignoring their suffering. It is not easy to forget the past and exist as nothing ever happened. First of all, the victims should be freed from the paralysing isolation and self-pity in which they often live in. This involves the building or renewing of communication inside the communities which is a responsibility of political, community and religious leaders and other respective organizations. It also involves the concerned parties to build confidence first in oneself and then in each other in a safe environment. It is also vital to empathise with the feeling of each other. Empathy comes with the victim’s willingness to listen to the reasons for hatred of those who caused pain and with the understanding of the offenders of the anger and bitterness of those who suffered. It is for this cause that Centre for Peace Building and Reconciliation (CPBR) render their services in a bid to fill the gaps between the communities in Sri Lanka creating the platform for necessary dialogue. CPBR was co-founded in the year 2002 by Professor Jayantha Seneviratne and Dishani Jayaweera, a dynamic Attorney-at-Law who gave up her profession for this noble cause. CPBR has been working with faith leaders from the year 2008 and as an expansion of its interfaith work CPBR has taken steps to set up its sister organization `Woman’ to work with female religious leaders and interfaith women groups.
Woman, who has the power to create life, intubate and deliver to the world, life’s very nurturing force is called to strive to bring about change and become whatever she wants, growing and developing into the life she chooses while healing the souls of others. `Woman’, pursue non-traditional ways to achieve their eternal dream `Heal the Past: Build the future, through healing the body, mind, soul and soil. One of the main initiatives under woman is the Female Inter-Faith Initiative (FIFI) which aims at objectives such as building connections among diverse religious and regional women leaders in order to bridge their communities together, to develop their knowledge and capacities to transform inner, inter, social conflicts through intra faith and interfaith dialogues and actions that builds relationships amongst them to celebrate togetherness and womanhood.
At the recently held symposium on `The Role of Women and Dialogue in Reconciliation’ witnessed the participation of 200 female religious leaders and 200 woman leaders from Anuradhapura, Polonnaruwa, Jaffna, Vauniya, Batticaloa, Galle and Colombo. It also saw the launch of Interfaith Women Religious Circle – IWRC and interfaith Woman Collective IWC to strengthen the current reconciliation process.
Creating safe spaces for women
“With decades old strength and wisdom from our mother organization, Centre for Peace Building and Reconciliation-CPR, we wanted to create a safe space for women of different faiths, ethnicities and religions to share their views and find their inner selves to connect to the world to heal each other. In 2013/14 we started to work with woman religious leaders. ‘Rising Woman’ initiative was created on behalf of their request,” Co-founder CPBR, Dishani Jayaweera said.
“Bringing recycling, reconciliation, re-building, re-designing and re-interpreting into one cycle, we have chosen creativity and care for earth as the entering point. We were exploring how we could bring women in gardens, farms, kitchens and factories into political discourse while adding new colour into their lives. Colour of spirituality beyond religion. Colour of self-esteem, self-affirmation and self-care. Colours of compassion, empathy and togetherness. Colours of womanhood and human-hood,” she said.
Jayaweera says dialogue for reconciliation has always been involving religious men in our society. Thus, it was high time to create a platform and a safe environment for women to see, read, understand and interpret everything as they experience it. “When it came to interfaith dialogues, the religious leaders were always men. Women religious leaders were not able to voice their ideas and opinions. I found that they have the most beautiful ideas and interpretations and they are so humane. I as a secular person saw the need of space for women religious leaders to explore ways to first understand and heal themselves and then heal one another and all living human beings while embracing the identity of our womanhood,” she said.
“In Sri Lanka, 73 to 76 percent are religious. Religious people can access the mindset they can connect better with people and change their mindset. There has always been a gap between practice and religion. The conflict has made wounds which are too deep and without healing the wounds first, we cannot think of reconciliation,” Jayaweera added.
Together with Dishani Jayaweera, Chandra Ratnayake who is a co-founder of `Woman’ has been a strength in achieving its mission of interconnecting sisterhood that ignites inner power of women by healing, celebrating diversity and womanhood through creative and nature friendly efforts. Ratnayaka assist many women from different paths and struggles to make products that will empower them financially.
“While healing the wounds and interconnecting with each other, we also empower these women economically. We exchange knowledge and share our experiences. Through our work we want to create new things which are environmentally friendly. We are together like a family. We live in one house for days when we have to complete work. There is no one above anyone. We all take part in creating things that are novel to the market and produce non harmful products for the Good Market in Colombo. We learn from each other and grow together. I am experiencing a whole new culture full with togetherness and fairness. I have friends in all communities,” Ratnayaka said.
“The gardens, kitchen, stitching centres became a medium of dialogue for us. While we connect to our own religion and culture, we also got the opportunity to explore another’s religion and culture. We understood that we can work without discrimination,” she added.
Ratnayaka said in future they hope to introduce their products under the `Woman’ label to the markets in Colombo.
Hidden talents
“Most of us did not realize our talents. We were caged then but now we are social. We are confident and I believe we are examples for women who question their limitations. We have liberated from self-censored thinking and at present most of us are feeling brand new,” Ratnayaka added.
A team member from the Nothern Province, C. P. Koushalya joined in to voice her opinion and experience in this initiative of healing the wounds of the past and reconciliation.
“For the first time in our lives we understood that peace can be obtained. If ever ethnic problems arise once again, I am sure the Sinhalese will stand for us and raise their voice. We are not alone in this journey of life. When we feel the love and caring of the Sinhalese people, we feel guilty that we have been so closed. We realise the mistakes on our side and it is sad to ignore their concern. Sinhalese also feel the same way about us and the Interfaith Women’s Collective is an opportunity to bridge the gap between the communities. The journey we start today will continue until eternal peace is dawned through reconciliation,” Koushalya said.
“After the conflict we had many groups in Jaffna assisting us with our livelihood, but this time we experience a difference. When it comes to stitching, the instructors from other districts and areas take us through the whole process from teaching, designing, selecting materials, cutting, prizing and marketing. We are being introduced to new fashions and trends in the Colombo market. So we are able to cater to the existing demand. We also get the opportunity to participate in cookery classes and we are given the knowledge of baking cakes which is new to many of us, as we are more accustomed to traditional recipes. Another new area we were exposed to is photography. Many ladies are able to take up photography as a profession in Jaffna. About sixty women are involved in the Jaffna circle. It is a joy to work with all these wonderful women of all parts of the country,” she added.
It is not all work for these women, but there is rest and play too. Dancing to traditional music, taking photographs and enjoying the different cultures enrich their lives. `Woman’ hubs are designed in such a way for women to come together, to share their lives and to connect themselves with others, to listen to oneself and another in a deeper level while being in a community that contributes to heal the past and build the future.
`Woman’ is hoping to initiate alternative education centres for young girls in Jaffna, especially in war affected areas. Film making initiative for young girls from different ethnic, religious, political backgrounds, setting up healing hubs at regional level (natural building and eco village concepts) and promoting healing through art, culture, spiritual practices and gardening are also a few other areas that will be explored to uplift the communities in Sri Lanka offering them a better future in togetherness and fairness.
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